。我不上班，就是在旅行的路上→→

How to love someone

How to love someone
without hesitation?
without delusion?
without confusion?

Once you are in love,
does it mean that you are no longer alone,
but also losing something?
Something about freedom,
something about being funny,
or even crazy. 

Sometimes,i just try to be okay,but i am not.
I try to be easy,but I feel fuzzy.
Try to be the girl I used to be,but i failed.
Perhaps, loving someone is equal to 
losing some part of your own.

I am sorry
If i am too childish.
I am sorry
If you don't think I've ever cared about you.
I am sorry
If I was born to be pessimistic.
I am sorry
that I didn't try my best to love you.
Somehow, I am happy
I am happy that you can still love me as you always do.
Even though I've never treated you well.

How to love someone?
I am still learning.
I am who I am.
But I wish to love,
to love someone I really care about.
To love someone
who might be YOU.

2006的今天，我寫下了這篇文章─如何去愛一個人。沒想到，兩年過了，我還在學，或許，我該找個人一起生活，甚至結了婚，再用一輩子的時間，去學習怎麼愛一個人。關於愛的書，那麼多，但是總沒有公訂版本，沒有正解，沒有所謂的教科書，只能自己去嘗試，自己去體會，然後找到適合自己的方式。

突然發現，我躲在殼裡好久了，忘了怎麼跟人互動，忘了什麼叫做捨不得，忘了怎麼相信別人，因為我想相信的人有限，所以好不容易爬出殼，想要試試看沒有殼的感覺，卻擔心受傷，或者一時不察，還是會被飄落的樹葉割傷。我忘了怎麼談戀愛，忘了怎麼回到最初的感動和關懷，忘了怎麼關心自己在意的人，忘了把心拿出來和人分享，因為只有少數人感受過，而我從此沒再給了。


我害怕對你冷漠，但又怕你太想接近我
我了解你的執著，所以小心翼翼不回頭
這些你把我寵壞的六年，
我已經失去了一些能力，
但願我能再次找回屬於自己的動力
在自己和他人之間    找到平衡